Late-Night Personalities Take Aim At Trump's Latest 'Gold Card' Visa Scheme

Television's leading entertainers devoted the broadcast criticizing former President Donald Trump's just unveiled visa program, labeled the "golden visa," portraying it as a clear pay-to-play scheme for the rich.

The Late Show's Witty Spin

Kicking off his show, Stephen Colbert presented a sardonic Christmas tune directed at the president. "He's compiling a list, reviewing it twice, and then handing that list to the agents at ICE," he sang. "Donald Trump ... ruins everything he handles."

The focus was the controversial plan which permits foreign nationals to acquire U.S. residency for an investment of one million dollars, with a "top-tier" tier for $5 million. An official website pledges processing "with unprecedented speed."

"A brief thought here to affluent applicants: prior to you pony up, what about Canada?" Colbert remarked.

He noted that the scheme is also designed to "extract cash" from firms looking to hire skilled workers, requiring significant costs. "That's a lot of fees, however if you enroll, you additionally get free accommodation at a property of your choice – if it's the that one hotel," he continued.

"The best background check the government has before done," remarked Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick, "that $15,000 vetting to make sure these people truly are eligible to be in America."

"That is important, you have to prove you're suitable to be an American," Colbert responded. "The initial query: how many hamburgers would you eat for a free T-shirt?"

Jimmy Kimmel's Scathing Critique

On his late-night program, Jimmy Kimmel dubbed the visa program the "U.S. Access Express Card."

"Here's a card that will allow rich foreigners to live here," he explained. "For a million bucks, you get legal visitor status, you get a route to citizenship, and a presidential pardon for one major crime of your choosing."

"Maybe it's time to revise that poem on the Statue of Liberty – forget about your tired masses. Give us a million bucks, you're in!" he remarked.

Kimmel lampooned the lack of detail of the form, saying it is "harder to start a Wordle account." He lamented that Trump "believes citizenship is something you can sell, like a timeshare."

"That's right, the finest people are the rich people," Kimmel quipped. "It's what Jesus always said! It's in the Bible. He says it's simpler for a camel to go through the eye of a needle if you offer the needle a million dollars."

Seth Meyers on Economic Concerns

Elsewhere, Seth Meyers addressed Trump's plunging poll ratings during financial concerns. "People gave Donald Trump a another term because they were upset about the economy," he noted.

Recently, in a bid to address cost of living, Trump held a briefing in front of a array of grocery items, where he reacted oddly to boxes of cereal.

"Lovely packaging, I think I'm going to take a few of them with me to my place and have a lot of fun," Trump remarked. "Like the Cheerios, I haven't had Cheerios in a while."

"He's so incredibly weird," Meyers said. "What do you mean, you're going to take them home to your cottage to have a lot of fun with them? What exactly happens with those Cheerios?"

Meyers concluded by criticizing right-leaning news arguments of Trump's economic performance. "Maybe instead of voicing concerns, you should give him a sparkling trophy similar to the one FIFA did," he joked.